Drunken Words. Sober Thoughts.

Hindi mo malalamang totoo ito hangga't 'di mo susubukan.

               Natatakot ako dati na uminom ng alak dahil baka ilang laklak lang, mawala na ako kaagad sa sarili ko. Baka magsabi na lang ako ng mga bagay na sa isip ko lang tumatakbo. Baka kung ano na lang ipaggawa sa akin ng mga kasama ko, sundin ko. Baka gumawa ako ng bagay na pagsisisihan ko.

               Hindi ko alam kung bakit sa mga napapanuod ko sa TV maging sa mga naririnig ko tuwing kinagabihan ng fiesta, mga nagwawalang lasing ang tumatambad sa tapat ng bahay namin, sumisigaw, nagwawala, at madalas may kaaway na kainuman din niya. May napanuod naman ako sa balita kailan lang na may dalawang lalaking 'di magkakilala, nagkatinginan lang, nagpatayan na. Nakakalungkot isipin na may mga taong nagpapadala sa emosyon nila 'pag nakainom sila. 

               Hindi pa man ako dumarating sa edad na 18 ay natikman ko na rin 'yung bagay na kinasasabikan ng mga kabataan sa henerasyon ngayon. Sumunod ang paninigarilyo, ang pag-inom ng alak ang pangunahing aliwan ng mga taong gustong magsaya o 'di kaya'y gustong kalimutan ang problema.

               Ako 'yung tipong tahimik na tao, 'yung hindi agad naglalabas ng saloobin at hindi nagbabahagi ng mga pananaw ko sa iba't ibang bagay maliban na lamang kung class recitation ang senaryo. Ako 'yung tipo ng taong hindi agad nagtitiwala sa mga taong kakakilala ko pa lang, closed book, ika nga nila. Pero dumating na rin ang pagkakataon na dahil sa alak ay malaya kong naibukas ang sarili ko tungkol sa mga bagay na hindi ko normal na nasasabi. Sa panahong iyon, alam ko ang ginawa ko. Malinaw pa sa akin ang napag-usapan namin ngunit ang mga salitang nabitawan ko, tila ayaw ko ng balikan. Hindi ko lang lubos akalaing kung babasahin ko ang naging usapan namin sa FB chat ay masasabi ko pala ang mga ganoong bagay. Hindi ko ito pinagsisihan dahil nasa sarili ako noong sinabi ko ang salitang binitawan ko doon at patungo naman ito sa iisang bagay. 

               Nakakatuwa lang isipin na dahil sa alak, mas naipapakita natin ang natatagong bahagi ng ating sarili na kadalasan nating itinatago. Dahil sa alak ay mas nagiging bukas tayo sa mga bagay na pilit nating ibinabaon sa isipan natin. 

               Hindi natin maitatangging parte ang alak sa bawat okasyon sa pamilyang Pilipino. Tunay ngang nakakadagdag ito ng kasiyahan dahil napapahaba nito ang kwentuhan maging seryoso man o iyakan ang tema ng usapan. Kailangan lang nating isaisip na lahat ng sobra ay nakakasama. Magkaroon pa rin dapat tayo ng kontrol sa ating mga sarili at siguraduhing ang isip pa rin natin ang naghahari sa buong katauhan natin.

Futile Days

         This is to share how lazy I can get by not updating this blog site of mine. I made a promise to myself weeks ago to at least post a blog or two every week, and as you may see, so far my last entry was during Mother's Day. I'm detesting myself now for bumming around during the past days. I've done nothing worthwhile since time immemorial. Yes, I mean it. On certain occasions, I force myself to open a book, the only book available (the least I have since that's what my brother is majoring) is Psychology (which will be one of my subjects this coming semester), and read it starting from the authors' descriptions up to the first five pages, and from there, I stop. I can't even recall what I've read and understood; If I've understood them, well, that's still a question.

        Next Monday, on the 6th of June to be particular, I will come to class as a sophomore already. I'm expecting a lot of things to change, of course, for the better. I'm referring not to the looks of my blockmates (because I love them just the way they are, especially YOU), not also to the facilities we have, but to the subjects we would be facing, and by that, I'm including the professors: to teach as effortlessly and as challenging as their examinations are, and to be fair as the spring and autumn equinoxes are giving day and night. But especially, I'm expecting more from myself: to be productive each day and during every opportunity life's giving me. I'm hoping to improve my rendering techniques both in handling watercolor and color pencils, which for sure I will let come into being. I'm hoping also to be firm with my decisions, and not to waste any chance that will be given to me; my plan was to get semi-active on my extra-curricular activities, and to apply once more as a Student Assistant at ITC (Information Technology Center, the one that's responsible for handling and updating the PLM website and Facebook, and other matters which involves technical matters, apparently), but I'm again promising myself to be involved on the latter for this sem only. With regard to my extra-curricular involvement, I was appointed by the UAPSA former prex to be the 2nd year representative, and since I'm willing to try it, I accepted the post. I just don't know what responsibilities it will leave me but I'm just so sure that it'll be just so light that it won't interrupt my studies at all.

        This year and in the years to come, I'm gearing up to be productive as I can be, and set my direction straight by focusing on my studies. But I'm not closing my doors to that 'momentary beating' of my heart that if that comes, so be it. 

      I guess this is it for now. Tomorrow I'll be getting physical with some high school friends at Badminton City and will proceed to ITC afterwards. Uhh, my fail, I mean later. Good night!

It's All Worth It

          Today has been just one of our usual days: no spur-of-the-moment scene nor luscious food served on the table. Although I know in fact that there should be at least some sort of surprise for our mother, we didn't had the chance to prepare for that. Money could be an issue, but if you don't have it, our mothers would undoubtedly understand that. In fact, all they just wanted to hear are the simple words "Happy Mother's Day!" and "I love you" which are usually sealed with a kiss. This can already bring tears to their eyes and that's what can make their day special. I had the chance to greet her through Facebook to show my friends how proud I am to be her son as well as greeting her personally which is way more sincere and intimate. And though I spent the whole day just sleeping (When it's raining, it really feels great to catch some Z's.), I can say that we, her children, succeeded in putting her inwardness at peace as much as making her say "It's all worth it."

          Happy Mother's Day, Ma! We love you very much! :')

          Also, I want to share this beautiful work about mothers posted on http://paulocoelhoblog.com/2011/05/08/character-of-the-week-the-mother/.

Character of the Week: The Mother

by Erma Bombeck

When the Good Lord was creating mothers, He was into his sixth day of “overtime” when an angel appeared and said:

“You’re doing a lot of fiddling around on this one.”

And the Lord said, “Have you read the specs on this order?

* She has to be completely washable, but not plastic;

* Have 180 movable parts… all replaceable;

* Run on black coffee and leftovers;

* Have a lap that disappears when she stands up;

* A kiss that can cure anything from a broken leg to a disappointed love affair;

* And six pairs of hands.”

The angel shook her head slowly and said, “Six pairs of hands… no way.”

“It’s not the hands that are causing me problems,” said the Lord. “It’s the three pairs of eyes that mothers have to have.”

“That’s on the standard model?” asked the angel.

The Lord nodded.

“One pair that sees through closed doors when she asks, ’What are you kids doing in there?’

“Another here in the back of her head that sees what she shouldn’t but what she has to know.

“And of course the ones here in front that can look at a child when he goofs up and say, ’I understand and I love you’ without so much as uttering a word.”

“Lord,” said the angel, touching His sleeve gently, “Go to bed. Tomorrow…”

“I can’t,” said the Lord, “I’m so close to creating something so close to myself. Already I have one who heals herself when she is sick

“…can feed a family of six on one pound of hamburger

“… and can get a nine-year-old to stand under a shower.”

The angel circled the model of a mother very slowly. “It’s too soft,” she sighed.

“But she’s tough!” said the Lord excitedly. “You cannot imagine what this mother can do or endure.”

“Can she think?”

“Not only can she think, but she can reason and compromise,” said the Creator.

Finally, the angel bent over and ran her finger across the cheek.

“There’s a leak,” she said. “I told You were trying to push too much into this model.”

“It’s not a leak,” said the Lord. “It’s a tear.”

“What’s it for?”

“It’s for joy, sadness, disappointment, pain, loneliness, and pride.”

And the Mother was created – a work of genius.

Making The World A Better Place

(This is a reaction paper I submitted as a requirement for our History subject during our First Semester in First Year. This concerns our Muslim friend, Ardy, which happened to be our interviewee to clear things out which baffled our minds at that point of time.)

Making the World a Better Place

"The primary duty of the Muslim as set forth not once but many times in the Koran is 'to command good and forbid evil.' It is not enough to do good and refrain from evil as a personal choice. It is incumbent upon Muslims also to command and forbid."

                                                           -- Islam And The West, Bernard Lewis

                What oftentimes separate ourselves from others are the differences we each have which oppose our beliefs. A barrier is said to be present that builds a huge gap between the two parties—the primary cause of cultural, as well as of our religious differences. But, alter the way you think towards our Muslim friend, Ardiyah Y. Lampa, a freshman student of Pamantasan ng Lungsod ng Maynila, taking up BS Architecture.

                Ardy or Ate Ardy, as what we fondly call her, is no doubt a Filipino Muslim. I have to admit that I was surprised during the first week of classes that I have a blockmate who is a Muslim woman, together with a Protestant, Adventist, and name all those other Christian sects, all contained in one block (This was the time when 11 of us still share in the class of Block 1; now we are transferred to the other block.). Having been from a Catholic institution for 12 years, starting from Kinder to Fourth Year high school, makes me unaware of the side of the Filipino minority especially when dealing with them including our Muslim brothers. Studying in a university like PLM is like a new world has opened for me, a vaster one, uniting individuals from all walks of life and culture in a single campus.

                We set a schedule for Ardy to be interviewed and it transpired during our free day which was last Tuesday, July 13, 2010, in order not to have conflicts with our time since we only used to be blockmates. The scorching heat of the sun and the high level of humidity inside the Puerto Real Gardens in Intramuros did not bring us to a standstill and still pursued our interview with our friend. The shade of the wide, old tree has been helpful in conducting the said activity. Several questions were asked to our interviewee such as “Have you experienced discrimination?,” “Why a Muslim man is limited to have four wives only?,” “How does your daily routine as a Filipino Muslim happen?,” and the like changed our impressions towards our Muslim brothers. (I need not to state the answers we arrived at since even as a Catholic, I somehow already knew the answers to these questions, having a background knowledge and reading articles beforehand about Muslim people.) However, what struck me most about Ardy were not the words coming from her mouth but rather the way she acts and gets along with her non-Muslim friends that truly makes her profoundly different from others.

                Far from the perception we have towards the Muslim community particularly those in Iraq, Saudi Arabia, and in our very own Mindanao, our Muslim brothers are not in truth dissimilar with us, Christians. In fact, they are much disciplined individuals for strictly following rules stated in their Qur’an especially with regards to their manner of clothing and for not eating forbidden foods such as pork. Muslims need not be frightened off just because terrorists in the downside of our country belong to the same group. Just like anyone of us, we must embrace every culture comprising within our country. It is a God-given blessing and should be accepted with deep discernment. In the long run, what beyond doubt separates a group from another is not with the impact a difference brings to the other, but with our lack of will to understand and give each one an opportunity to prove oneself.

           Ardy is just one of those few fortunate Muslims who are treated fairly regardless of their religious background. Just her implicit way of lending her time to us is an enough reason to show good treatment not just to her but to all of our Muslim brothers. Let not the bad news we hear alone lead us to make an unfair judgment. It pays to know them personally and there we can find that they are not all the same. We must always remember that a Muslim is not anything if not a Filipino.

  It is through with our constant communication and showing respect to other individuals which make a big leap of difference and peace. It is through with our open-mindedness and ability to accept divergence within the people which make the world a better place.

  

Seña, Daniel Franco B.                                                                                  

BS Arch 1 Block 2                                   

2010-20442

From Resentment to Delight

     What supposed to be a jogging session today turned out as just plain "walking" around the UST field. I headed to Riza's house upon receiving Kim's text message to drop by there first. It was around 5:45 PM when I came; the picture was totally happy as the whole Evangelista clan was there, together with Kim, Kevin, and Bettina. To catch up with their "light" drinking session, I took a shot of tequila, aided by lemon squeeze, and a pinch of table salt. It was refreshing! Without the lemon, the taste, I deem, would be totally dull (I'm not a heavy drinker.). A few minutes later, I and Bettina proceeded to UST, and met up with her friends Abbey and Meinell. Abbey is a schoolmate of ours in PLM while Meinell is a Nursing student from UST. The three of them were batchmates way back in high school. That time I was one of a heck excited to jog, but with their personal reasons behind, we instead opted to just walk around the field. I felt sorry for myself leaving the original plan behind, but I guess that was lame to discuss for walking is a "form" of work-out, too. What consisted of our "walking work-out" was their unending talk of their own crushes, their similarities with each other, and so on. I was like giving only a nod and smile to agree with them. Finally, we bade goodbye to the two ladies and I was again with Bettina to head back to Riza's place. Her cousin, Carlo, joined the picture. We ate pizza and continued with our shot-squeeze session. Too bad for me for the bottle was about to be finished; it was worth it, though. That also calls for a repeat, and by that time, I'll come a little earlier. With much resentment to the jogging plan, we decided to just walk on our way home. Well, first to her house, and still not being contented, I continued to walk on my way to mine. It was a little exhausting, but that was the part I really enjoyed. As you see, I still have energy left to share this encounter of mine. Let's call it a day! =))

Stay By My Side

It has been ages since the last time I posted a blog. The previous ones I have here are just old entries from my Multiply account. Well, I consider myself a noob to this blogging site. My friends in high school are starting to have their own account, and as for me being a bum these days with nothing much to do, I didn't had second thoughts of joining them. So here it is. I hope I'll be active this time considering it's only a month away before the resume of my sophomore year as an Architecture student! I still have a lot to learn in my field, but time will pass, and eventually I can call myself as the francodopeyace of my generation, I mean, the greatest but modest architect of my time! =)) Forgive me for sounding corny. Take care everyone! =))

Ang Baybayin at Mga Bituin

14 May 2009

      Isang karaniwan ngunit malungkot na araw ang lumipas ngayon. Inihatid na kasi ang tita ko sa huling hantungan kanina lang. Samantalang ngayong dapit-hapon ay papasyal-pasyal lang kami rito sa baybayin ng Baler. Kahit papaano ay nililimutan ang kalungkutan na inaasahang sa paghampas ng alon ay mapawi nito ang kasalukuyang nararamdaman.

   Tamang lugar ito para magpahangin. Habang unti-unti ko nang natatanggap ang kanyang paglisan ay nandoon naman ang aking mga tihuyin sa isang banda na ilang metro lang ang kalayuan --hinahayaang panandaliang iwan sa limot ang alaala ng kapatid na sinasabayan ng paglaklak ng alak.

     Di-ganon kabilisan ang pagsapit ng dilim dahil sa dakong silangan ito kung saan hindi natatanaw ang paglubog ng araw. Baka naman din nagkamali akodahil kung sa kabilang banda ang araw, mas unang didilim sa lugar na ito na nakatapat sa silangan. (Kayo na bahala, basta napansin ko lang na matagal.) Mabagal ang takbo ng mundo rito ika nga subalit hindi rin naman ibig sabihin ay 'di ko naiaalis sa isip ang nararamdaman kani-kanina lang. Masasabi kong nagtagumpay ang alon sa pag-aliw sa akin na kalaunan ay sinundan ko pa ito ng pagtampisaw sa tubig at pagkuha ng mga di-makakalimutang litrato. Sino ba namang hindi maeengganyo kapag nasa harap mo na ang alon na tila gustong makipaglaro sa'yo? Alam kong maski ikaw ay gagawin mo rin ang ginawa ko. Panandalian ay namulat sa akin ang kasiyahan na inaasahang hindi mawawala.

    Kasabay ng pagtapos ko sa sa nakaraang talata ay sumapit na ang hindi ko man lamang na namamalayan na gabi sa tabing-d

agat. Iniwasan ko nang makipaglaro muli sa mga hampas ng alon dahil sabi nila ay nagbabago daw ang daloy nito sa gabi. Isa pa, wala na rin namang naglakas-loob na manatili sa kanina kong pinuwestuhan, 'yun din ang paniniwala ng mga tao doon at marahil sila na rin mismo ay mga saksi. Ang mga bata at matatandang kanina lamang ay nagpapasarap sa tubig ay unti-unti na ring umaahon. Sapagkat walang mga poste ng ilaw na nakatayo sa paligid ng baybayin ay minabuti na rin ng mga taong iwasan ang lugar sa gabi. Mabuti ng ligtas, 'di ba?

    Sa dahilang hindi pa namin nilulubayan ang lugar dahil sa paghihintay sa aming mga tiyuhin ay nagawa kong pagmasdan ang kala

ngitan. Nang mapansing bihira ang ganitong senaryo sa Maynila ay daglian pa akong huamanp ng mapupuwestuhan na upuan nang sa gayo'y matanaw nang mabuti ang isang tampok sa madilim na kalangitan. "Napakaraming bituin." ang banggit ko sa sarili ko. Alam kong ito na rin ang iniisip nyo na nakita ko. Kagalakan ang unang lumitaw sa loob ko nang masaksihan ko ito. Kung sa Maynila ay masaya na kong makakita ng lampas sa sampung bituing nakakakalat sa langit ay paano pa kaya rito na bilangin man sila ay 'di ko sinubukan. Gumaan ang loob ko. Naisip ko bigla 'yung kabataan ko.

    Habang pinagmamasdan ang iba't-ibang kulay na palamuti sa langit ay sumagi naman sa isip ko yung sinasabi sa akin ng lola ko nung bata pa ko. Totoo kayang 'y

ung mga lumisan na sa mundo ay nagiging isang bituin? Totoo rin kaya na kung gaano man kalaki ang nagawa nilang marka sa mga taong natulungan nila ay ganoon din kakinang ang ipapakita n'ya habang nasa itaas? Napangiti ako. Napag-aralan na namin ito noong elementarya pa lang kaya alam kong walang katotohanan ang sinabi ko kanina. Marahil ganun nga. At marahil sana, malayo man sa katotohanan, ay nandiyan ang mga lumisan sa mundo tuwing gabi na pinagmamasdan ang pagtulog natin. Hindi man sa katauhan ng bituin, pero alam natin nandiyan lang sila.

    Oras na para bumalik sa bahay ng lola ko sa kalapit na bayan. Panahon na para iwan ang baybayin na naging karamay ko sa mga sandaling nakalipas. Hindi oras para magpaalam sa mga bituin, dahil habang nasa sasakyan ay nasisilip ko pa rin ang anyo nila. Alam kong nariyan sila saan man tayo pumunta.

Giving Everything, Receiving Little

This was my formal theme entry in English way back in Third Year high school. I just felt the need of posting this in lieu of the occasion this coming Sunday. 

Happy Mother's Day to all!

        A woman whose job is timeless. She is selfless that all her concerns are only for her children and not for someone else. A beautiful lady who brought life to marriage and proved that if without her, her man is nothing. She had no second thoughts of leaving her job as an accountant since the day she gave birth, and in the long run, put herself into a profession that is full of sacrifices, though in return, not income but happiness and contentment are the only things she receives. I know it already came to your mind the person I am talking about; to spell out, my mother.

        My mother has been very dear to me. At this point, I have just arrived home from school, so worn-out. I straight away changed clothes, sat on the soft couch located in our living room, and tuned in to my favorite cartoon show. Then, a cool breeze touched my face. I glanced at the window, that time I knew it was raining so hard. Out of the blue, I  looked back and remembered the scenarios during my beginning years in school: How early the time she wakes up every morning; her preparations to pack up our baon; the advices she gives to do my best in school; and how she bids me goodbye, usually packed with a kiss.

        I acquired the concept of learning from her before I knew there were teachers. Right after fetching me from school and sending me home, she insistently checks my notebooks to see those given assignments by my teachers. We finish it together and even prepares me exercises to further improve my knowledge on the current lesson. It does not end here. We used to read together stories with moral values, putting in plain words how the plot goes. There came a time where in, because of the love of reading, the two-paragraph selection which we have not yet been tackled in school was given a chance to be memorized by the two of us. That night, I joined her in bed just before sleeping and once again, we delivered the lines we have put in mind, giving me consideration to the words I wrongfully said and mispronounced. The following day, with much excitement to attend my class, our English teacher told us to bring out our books, and altogether read the next selection. She noticed the way I seemed not giving attention reading my book, though seeing me expressing the right words. When I saw her staring at me, I immediately scanned to the page where the selection was and pretended reading it. Being somewhat swollen with pride, I said to myself, “I think there’s no need for this, this story was already in my mind since yesterday.” How funny reminiscing these occurrences again which I never thought I would put into writing. Dismissal came, as I walk towards the gate of our school, I saw my mom sitting on one of the benches situated there. I know she would be proud to see how glad I am having a red star-shaped stamped on my hand. It feels like I am ten years younger thinking again of the impact those small things gave me, and how my parents especially my mom feels about it.

       If without her, I would not be able to cite these childhood encounters of mine. She keeps on sharing in front of our relatives and family friends the funny things I used to do during my childhood days and how I interact to other people, which were quite shameful for me having heard them laughing.

        Back then, when my father scolded me for having performed wrong things or for having behaved badly, I ended up crying. I cannot say my siblings were there for me during those instances for they would only tease me. Good thing, there was my mother, who would bring me out under the table after crying so hard. She would comfort and give me advices to refrain doing my mistakes again.

        Indeed, she has been my special friend, a mentor, a cheerleader, and an advocate, who never fails to support me in my every endeavor and take care of me even after I answered back at her. This unconditional love which drives her feelings can be truly understood unless you experienced being a mother, too.

       Those days from which I acted as if I was a tail of my mom just to be at her side seemed unforgettable to me. She used to be my conscience when I plan something wrong. More importantly, she has been my childhood friend who would also demonstrate childish behavior the same with me. A friend to whom I also used to get mad at.

        Once in a year we celebrate a special day that is only for mothers. They experience to be given flowers and letters which they deserve. Whatever they receive though, the simple yet heartfelt words of “thank you” and “I love you” from their kids are what they cherish most. These simple ways can bring tears to our mothers and they will realize that all they have done are worth it.

        Right now, I am thinking of the person I would probably have become if there will be no mother like her born in this world. Maybe I am still a helpless teenager longing for a mother’s care and attention. I may not know the story behind Hansel and Gretel, and how bad children will end up as unlikable citizens when they grow old. Maybe until now, I still do not know how to value education, and how red star-shaped stamp would bring excitement to kids after returning home from school. Maybe, when I gradually grow old, I would not bring an impact to other people, a futile person, so to say. In fact, when I eventually die, I would only be known as someone, someone who made nothing particular. I stop and think again. Suddenly, I felt a hand gently tapping my shoulder. It was mom waking me up for dinner. I raised my head and looked at the television. The show I was watching earlier did not come into my sight but a news program. I felt somehow disappointed. However, I smiled and thanked Him for having given me someone like her. I gave my mom a tender kiss at her right cheek the same way she to me did when I was little. Certainly, it was her to whom I greatly owe my life.

        “The ultimate measure in life is not who you have become, or what have you become. But what others have become because of you.”  --Abraham Lincoln